omggg

omgggg.
havnt posted in MONTHS.

and woahh a lot has happened but cba to put it all down haha

1. prom was good.
2. i passed my GCSEs
3. i have removed all the negativity from my life, and you know what. I am so happy atm.

Gonna be 1 Month with Joe on wednesday :) and thank god hes back from holiday then :D

Over the summer, i think ive grown up and moved on. Also realising who my TRUE friends are, and i love them very much :) (L)

Oh yeah, parents got married. That was nice.

College, next monday. EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.
im scared excited nervous. everything basically.
going to be good as :D

but yes, i will try and keep this updated. but i doubt thats gonna happen ;D haha

well, from now until i next can be bothered :D

well..

havn't blogger in ages. due to laptop being a gay.

but yeah.
not with josh anymore, nan passed away /:
finished school apart from exams etc

got my prom dress fitted (Y) so excited :)

urmm nothing else exciting idon't think lol

IPhoneeeee :)

got an iPhone <3 actually love it SO MUCH <3

had my hair done today, not impressed tbh its just mehh lol

got lizzi round atmm <3 watching the magic roundabout coz we are dat cool ;)

doing bugger all tomorrow (Y)


byeeee xx

Goingg Goood

Well everything going good atm :)

Having a good easter (Y)
done revision - ishh.. lol


anndd yeahh, generally happy :)


byee xx

Fucking Laptop.

Well yes, the laptop is broke. Msn itune adn spotify work, just the internet explorer doesn't.

This computer - doesn't have msn - thankyou ebuddy (L)


Remember ME - is shite. But i had a rpretty cool day with Hannah yesterday, topped off with Waterloo Road - which tbh was a bit tragic.. lol

Today, with carolynn was epic - a lot of crap food and some epic films :) - UP, Bolt, A bugs life and Mulan (Y) 'great stone dragon have you awoken?' :L:L:L (L)



byee xxx

j'adore (L)

i miss you.
(L)

Happy Easter :)

Happy Easter All :)

spread the love, and chocolate? oh and R.I.P Jesus...lol?

Kinda gonna miss Cream Eggs, going to ahve to wait 'til next year.. But it'llbe worth it LOL Love Cream Eggs..

Family over today, for a bit.. MMM CHOCOLATE (L)
Rents got me New Moon, which i have watched 3 times already + the extended scene, YES I AM SAD :) <3

Cinema with Jesss tonight - how to train your Dragon :) we're cool (L) although a Dragon would be quite cool :)

anywho..

BYE!!!!!

(L)

backkk with Joshhh <3

starting off April freshh :)

ohhh and lots of rain, fun fun fun...


sleep, work and more work - my easter is planned.. :/ (Y)


Byee xxx

i don't need a parachute..

i don't need a parachute, baby if i got you (8)<3


soo cute that song :)

well this weekend was good - don't remember half of it :/ but HEEY! Josh and i broke up, but we still friends - tbhh it wasn't really working AND i feel like SHITTT now :/

effin rained today, drowned rat much? nice walk home, in the puddles. SO MUCH FUN! saw a little kid with wellies, splashing in puddles. SO JEALOUS!!! >.<

lol


BYEE xx

mmm :/

and sometimes the best thing to do is smile, and pretend that everythings ok, because some things just can't be explained.

i know i can count on youu (8)

my head, is actually like a radio atm, so many songs have been going round and round lol xD


Had a goodish day.
certain person i want to kill - but hey i can live with that.


cannot wait 'til this weekend (Y) gonna be great.

Happy birthday Hannnnnah for yesterday :) love you xx.



well yeahh..
BYEEE! xxx

:/

ill.
hate it.

rents annoying me.

BUUT.
hannah's birthday tomorrow :D party saturday :)
this weekend should be guuuuurd xD



xxx

Blurghh

Blurghh, have a cold. and it's horrible, my voice is going, i feel like shit (Y) its reaally sunny outside, and i want to go out. But i'm ill -_-

Saturday, it rained like a bitch. Town with Josh, Lizzi, Evie and Connor. Was nice :) Made my day, even if it rained (Y)

Also had a nice convo with Felix (Y) love getting the gossip from that kid :P


byeee xxx

AmyCanFlyyy

HYC gig was amaaaazing <3 with Lizzi, Carolynn, Hannah, Evie, Lauren, Kevin, Gloria, Jaz, Amy and Bethhhh :)

AmyCanFlyyyy signed my shirt (L)(L)(L) OMGAWWSHHH Ben (L) MARRY ME. ooft. the HOTTEST GINGER ON THIS PLANET <3

So yeashh, good night. Here with lizzzzzzzzi now :) gronolaa bars and the notebook (Y) stupid film :L


Bring on the rest of the weekend :D


byeee xx

Happy St Paddy's Day :)

FIRSTLY.
yr 9/10 killed our balloon. i was sad :/

BUUUT.
been hyper all day - twas good. Had a proper giggle with carolynnn all day :) and that cheered me up LOADS. nice walk home with jaaaz.
WHOO HAS BOUGHT TICKETS FOR THE ROCKET SUMMER!! SO EXCITED! love jaz. SO MUCH. (L)(L)
byrce avery, i am coming to kidnapp you sugarplum!!! <3 :)



byeees xxx

gotta love a cuppa tea.

I have drunk so much tea recently, i think i'm going to turn into a cup of tea soon. WOuldn't mind really lol.


Had a good couple of days, parents annoying me, but c'est le vie..


cannot wait for this weekend, HYC friday + sleepover with my wifeey :) miss my lizzi lots!!!! <3



xx

(L)

so yeah, went to the cinema with Josh, Jess and Emily :) Saw alice in wonderland 3D which i thought was pretty amazing :) Didn't know so many well known people were in it (Y) So yeah... josh asked me out in the middle of them film ^^ so randomly :L but cutee, and obvs i said yeaaah xD

rode elliee today :) she was good. Although nearly killed me when she spooked at a pidgeon >.< heart stopped for a moment :L


SOYEAH. goooood weekend (Y)


xx

Busted.

i love busted, i forgot how much i loved them!! listening to them non stop atm (Y)


got a pretty cool weekend lined up, cinemaa and riding (Y)


arguement with nickk today, he's being a bit of a twat tbh. :/ so he's not talking to me atm because i've 'changed' and tbh i don't think i've changed since last weeked :/ MEN!


hmph. annoyed.angry.upsetted a little :/


xxxx

Jabb.

Last one of three, so it'sall good (Y)


Went round Jess's and yeah had a good time, mmm pizzza (L) met up with Josh and Sean, they played Guitar Hero whilse Jess and I had a right ol' chat ;) Had a nice time :P (Y)


All over, goooooood mood (Y)


xxx

Perfect.

Had a pretty amazing weekend tbh :)


cinema on saturday, with Evie, Josh + Connor :) Princess and te frog, its alright, apart its like cheese on a stick :L too many songs. AND DISNEY KILLED A FIREFLY!!!
stupid people.

Today, went for a nice hack round Ifield with ellie and Lauren on Carrie. Was fun :)


that;s it, my life atm is perfect :D

lovee xxx

:D

and you are the only exception (8)
love that song soo much :)

well, i've had a good couple of days :) nothing is really bothering me atm, i'm just kinda caught up int he moment and flowing along with the crowd. I haven't been ARGHH YOU TWAT at anyone.
And i am constantly happy atm :)
family is annoying me.

things are looking up 2010 (Y) keep up the good work :P


byee xx

la la la..

well, there are certain events im looking forward to now :D

good chats tonights (L)


town with evie, bumping in to lizzzi who had a proper phone mix-up! and choked on dib dab.. silly girl :P

loooooove xx

1st March.

My horroscope for this month;

The waiting is over Scorpio. Your impassioned and impatient ruler is finally making an about-face and going direct on 10 March. All of those setbacks and delays that you thought were becoming a permanent reality are over. Say goodbye to that dreadful malaise provoked by the sense that nothing was moving forward in your life. Give Mars a few weeks to work out all the kinks. The middle of March may be the most tumultuous as a result of the Red Planet switching gears. The New Moon on the 15th in your romantic sector plants fresh seeds in the love and pleasure department for what you’d like to manifest over the next six months. The Full Moon in your dream zone will bring any repressed relationship desires to the surface on the 29th. And finally, on 31 March, Venus enters your relationship sector, sweetening any current trysts. March is quite a ride—but in the end, it’ll be the trip of a lifetime and one that you’ll find well-worth taking.


Bit of a read - but tbh, i am rather looking forward to that :)


Lovee xx

nice one nicola...

i don't think i have felt so disgusted with myself in a long time - maybe ever actually - so slutty. so eurghh.

i cannot believe me sometimes. i swere what i say in my head, and what i actually say/do don't work.

not only have i made myself feel like complete and utter crap. i have complicated someone elses life up - great.

nothing ever happens how i think it's going to.


bath. early bed. tomorrow i will smile like nothing's wrong.

don't care.

i don't care about guys - unless one decided to make an effort himself. hmph.

no point fussing and stressing over a guy who is taken and have no chance with anywhooo :L


so it's nick 21st and i got him so lovely chocolate in the shap of tractors or cars :) he liked it :)
made him some noodless and i put a candle in it :) lol it kinda sunk but STILL! :L it's the effort that counts. :)

had an alright day town with evie in the rain -___- and evie's broken umbrella (Y)


happy days again :) byee xx

I did it again..

ohh yuss; i like a taken guy. WHY DO I DO THIS. IT'S SHIT :L

yeahh i'll invite him here.. oh wait - girlfriend.
well i'll call him for a chat.. oh wait - GIRLFRIEND.

hopefully that wont last long (yn) aha

well, it is nicholasssssss' birthdaaay tomorrow. The big 21. Some people are just too old. AND i think it's not nice that he's going clubbing and I CANT GO! damn not being 18 -_-

well dont tell nickk but.. I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO GET HIM!! :S:S:S



well, extremely mixed emotions atm, i think its the pills. :L

BYEE xxx

isn't it obvious? (8)

Well i had another fab weekend.

Hannah, Evie and Jess came round, we hada chinese and wached jeepers creepers- forgot how muhcof a shit film that is :L- and mean girls.

sososo tired next day - we all woke up about twelve after our intense gossip 'til about four :)


Changing topics - i think i'vedone something i said i wasn't gonna do. I do recall telling myself, iwasn't gonna bother with guys, relationship, love and shit. Buti do believe, i may have fallen for someone- it's definately not love, but in time itcould be - i have a good feeling :)


'if holding hands is to descrete,let's make out in the middle of four street, if this flowers just ain't enough for you, help me god to tell me what to do, couldn't be more true, isn't it obvious that i love you?' (8)




bye <3

oh what a pleasent chav you are..

well went out for a nice ride with Lauren this morning. Ellie was an angel and so was carrie :)
Aaprt from, this chav. Oh they do make me laugh - and sneeze. I think i may be allergic :L He was trying to communicate, but i did apologise for not learning that language in school :)

Cannot wait for this afternoon with the girlies :) <3


BYEEEE!!

xD

well brinsbury interview; got in :)

liquid, was fun :) 3 guys, no bad. Think one of them was gay :L silly hair cut anyway, ahaa. Including, got my tongue bit - swere it ws bleeding :L

Lizzi got lucky aswell ;) And Evie with her guy :)

feet hurt so much, ears were buzzing, good night though (Y)


xx

fuckpancakes.

omggg, pancake day with nickk.

have eaten them ALL DAY
then papa came home, with...
PANCAKE MIX!

eughh.
never want to see one EVER AGAIN.


but overall good day :)
interview and liquid tomorrow :)


bye! <3

'Darling, there are chinese people in our bathroom' :L

ohh such a good weekend. Rode ellie who was an angel saturday morning. Round lizzi's for such a needed sleepover :)
Chocolatee, mmm. And wheat free fish finger :L

Chinese people in the bathroom :L well not ours AHA

Webcam photos which made me cry - with laughter :) aha

love you lizzi :)

Sunday, did bugger all.
Valentines day, whatta load of shite :L
nick came round coz i was home alone and didn't want to watch Being human on my own :L

today, doctors then I rode Carrie :) blesss her, shes so fat :L so cute ^^

byeeee!

Happy Birthday Taylor :)

It's taylor lautners 18th birthday :) But as he lives in america, he still can't buy alcohol 'til he's 21. GUTTED :P

Happy Birthday to Lilyy aswell :) 16 and legal ;D :L


Not much happened today, twas very cold, and i now have paint on my art; BUT i am no way gonna finish before tomorrow :S:S:S fml :/



bloom (L)

College; *ticks box*

yayayayayayayayayayayayayaaaaaa!

conditional placement :) four GCSEs between, A*-D and I am sortedd bludd.


EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEee

now, i am not stressed about it :)

misses dear bloom <3

Oh, that was needed :)

Oh how i do love having my bloom back (L)

pizza, chocolate (bought from spar; mmm spar guy :P ) and a lot of tea :) and tbh, a well and needed gossip from a true friend who won't judge, or tell people :D

maaan, i feel SO much better after that chat :)


Interview tomorrow *shits oneself*; lie in - GETTIN!


happy happy happy :D

things happen for a reason?

if things happen for a reason, my life is pretty damn fucked (Y)

I have muscles!!

well, i haven't rode 'properly' - like a one-to-one lesson is AGES. I had one today, on Ant with Peter and OMFGG my tummy muscles hurt like a bitch. Peter literally whipped me into the correct seat all in prepare for my interview on wednesday at Merrist Wood.

OH!
Saw the spar guy :) He now knows where i live :D hehe

In such a good mood atm :) "nothing's gonna be me down" (8)


lovelovelove xx

Wow, he has a nice...

I will call him the Spar Guy, as I do not know his name.

Spar guy, work in the Spar across the road. He is quite nice look-wise, and I don't really KNOW him but yeahh.

Third time seeing him now :P

This time, went to spa for; Milk, Noodles and I fancied something extremely bad for me so i got Ben and Jerry's Phish Food :)And spar guy said, that 1. he loved phish food, and 2. i looked nice :) offt, i could die for his smile, it's soo nice :D

Well.. there we go. Little uplift for the day :) <3

fuck it.

ignore the last blog >.<

men are dicks.

i needed that :)

Certain dinner with parents and felix, thought it was gonna be awkward as hell, but it wasn't :D
it was kinda nice :)

including a nice makeout session :D - i could get used to that :)

<333

tea :)

can you be addicted to tea? Because i think i am O.o

i cannot stop drinking it!!
mmm tea :) <3

6:58am

listening to my new love.
gotta cup of tea.
duvet.
<3



tell me how i am supposed to get you off my mind, when you know i really couldn't even if i tried (8)

Wow, it's February...

Thankyou Mumi for a nice day shopping :)

February already! zomgg, how fast is this year going!? Jeeze, slow down world. You're rushing my life away!


Had a nice conversation again today :) ^^

Oh! umm sorry?

don't you just hate it, when you put your foot in? and i mean like big time?!

Was on the phone to my godmother - who i never speak to, i've met like once she lives like in scotland or near enough. And i was just making convosation, so i asked how Brian was (her husband btw) when i said it my mums face went into a 'don't ask that' face, basically my godmother started crying - Brian died around christmas...

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKK!!

this is what happens when my mother never tells me things - fml aha

weekend.

Saturday; BP shopping, rich boy who was ''measuring me'' - wouldn't mine seeing him again ;)

Also, dinner with Hannah, Evie and Jess at Strada.Eminem, who stole Jess's Gnocchi and felt up her brother.
Alcohol at Hannah's, the eventful trip to Sains - hannah jumping for nik naks - bless her whens she tipsy, ahaa..

Sunday; nice riding :) and a nice evening texting someone who put a smile on my face :L even if it was for little while.


I love having good weekends :)

one word.

one word - is all it takes to ruin everything.

fuck.my.life.

i ruin everything.

why?

why can't i just accept that something is over?
why do i always have to try and fix something, even though i clearly know it shouldn't be fixed?
why do i always think about things that are in the past after i've alwasy said,'move on'

why do i always fall for the annoying dickheads who are incredibly sweet?

pain :(

stupid doctor.
stupid pain.


owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.

my brain has turned into mushh.

i've done ALOT of thinking this afternoon/evening. And now my brain actually hurts. I've thought about nearly everything from school to if i should dye my hair or not and a lot of stuff inbetween;about who i like/dislike and how do i know if i definatly like them/dislike them, why doing certain things benefits me/anyone in the future. Bad ideas and good ideas - mostly bad..

BRAIN ACHE

shoes.

i have new purple shoes.
they are amazing.
3/4 inches - can't remember exactly.
lots of straps
platform.


love them :)

it's 7am.

it's 7am, and normally i detest being up early - but i've been up for an hour, i've had 2 cups of tea, and i'm in a really good mood; waking up to cute texts puts a smile on my face :D

xo

It should be warmer.

Friday night; wondered with Evie. Met up with Hannah + Jess gots a chinese, and went back to Hannah's as it was cold and raining - stupid british weather - but we all had a right odl gossip xD

Saturday; Brighton with Hannah - so funny. Flirted with turkish men, who then followed us so we hid.. then we missed them :(
aha, hannah got a smile from a gimp :L
and i slapped an arse and got a number ;) from hannah's friend but still :L

weekend; so far so good (Y)

dreams.

okay, in english today, we were talking about dreams.. and i realised that i don't actually have a main dream/abition/ goal in life.

is that bad?

i mean, like yeah there are things i wanna do in the future but i wouldn't be bummed if it didn't happen..

:/

(8)

baaaaaack when, we used to talk about anything, when the nights were colder than usual and summertimes seems just not the same, what happened to our life back when?

the wigglers.

i hate them.

you think you've got rid of people that are negative/ not nice/ you want to move on from/ you just blantantly don't like them, then..

BAM!

they wiggle their stupid arses back in - fucking wigglers >.<

i want it gone.

1. snow. slush. sleet - whatever. It's bloody ridiculous!

2. my mood - bad mood all week :/

3. stress levals are all over the place

4. chocolate - it's making me fatter.

5. parents are doing my nut.

saw that coming..

well, i was unsure if i still liked someone. Until i found out this 'friend' is now obsessed with him after saying to me about how i should get back with him.. just me? or is that a bit wrong.




annoyed. again.


physics tomorrow.
fucked already.

oh go fuck off.

so annoyed.
so eurrgh >.<

i hate people who disagree with everything you say, or ''i've done/got that but better"

literally, go fuck yourself. I have no time for you!!


i really want some good news.. like proper good, OMG YESSS: good news, please :)


fucked chemistry up btw ;)

i'm okay thanks...

I GOT MA BOOTS xD sooo happy.

and i haves the giggles atm xD which is no help with you're trying to revise btw ;)

decided, to give Lara's party with my exes a miss xD

Had a nice time in town with Evieeee.


and yeahh, oh and btw, i solved my problem ;) and it wasn't scary at all, i'm just a loser.. :L still not telling rents though :L

OMGOMGOMG im hyper. and giggly...

:D

it can't be? oh shite..

well.. i assume you can pick a million things up from the title. And i'm still not gonna tell you what its about. I wasn't even going to make a blog.. but i'm bored and in a ''MY RENTS ARE GONNA KILL ME'' mood.

hmmm. I can only think of one soloution, and that scares me - like proper scares me. As i researched it, and I know it's safe now.. but still :

Happy note; going shopping tomorrow - getting the boots i've been praying for :) And the nik naks and chocolate i've been craving. Once home, i WILL revise for chemistry.

Sorted.

it actually works..

I went to a spa. An Re spa. On a friday afternoon. I paid attention, worked my brain. And you know what? I learnt a lot.

I know, i know it sounds silly. But in lessons, i never pay attention and never really take it in... but now, i'm going to. I'm gonna shut up in most lessons, (unless i HAVE to tell someone something:P) and focus, and you know what.. i AM going to pass my GCSEs.

I have never had to much positivity in myself... Well, i've kinda missed the 'new year, new start' and tbh that annoys me. I'm just gonna change my attitude about myself and what i can do. I'm going to try to be positive (it might not work) but this does NOT mean, i'm going to me nice :L

Anyway, busy weekend ahead; party with the exes on sunday :S Sometimes i hate lara :P - should be interesting... hehe kind of excited in a REALLY WEIRD MESSED UP WAY.

anywhoo, have a nice evening everyone :)
xxx

waiting for my uplift.

i just feel so.. blurrrrghh

i don't think there are any words to describe how i feel, but yeah, i'm not happy - although i'm giving the effect that i am, school mainly - i hate people asking, 'what's wrong?' IT'S CALLED NONE OF YOU BUISNESS. But yeah, i'm not totally sad, more annoyed? yes, at people.. not 1 person, multiple people and it's all BLURGHHH


could do with a good book and cuppa tea tbh, but it's all revision :/ (but i still gots me tea) - speaking of revision, i am waaaay stressing out over. I'm so behind in everything!!!!!!!


and btw, it happened again.. :/ sorry?

i feel like shit

title says it all really :/

i hate it.

I hate snow.

yeahh, when it first settles, it's like wow.. pretty...

but now. It'ss al this stupid solid snow/ice slush shit - not easy to walk in and AGHH

BRING BACK THE SUN MR WEATHERMAN!
please and thankyou :)

We love you Nettley

Yes, our headteacher has granted us two days off due to EXTREMELY heavy snow. Yes, snow. In horsham, and a lot of it :D

Well, i've done bugger all today :) Films, duvet and a nice pot of tea :)

Also, i've had many awkward and unpleasent/uncalled-for conversations and it's a bit :/ tbh

this is weird...

Right, so apart from the obvious, i don't like anyone atm. Which is weird...coz i normally like someone... maybe it's because there is no-one to like or i've liked everyone there is to like and i've run out of options.. :L

ahaa... i get bored so easily now, nothing to spend my time thinking about..


ANYWAY.


it's going to snow tomorrow. please be no school. PLEASE GOD!!

just friends?

Let's start with a little conversation I had with 'someone' and myself. I'll set the scene; a week ago, I was dumped without any reason whatsoever, so yes, I felt like crap, and didn't care about anything. New years eve, i got a phonecall from the 'dumper' explaining himself - I hung up- needless to say, I wasn't letting him ruin my new year. New years day, all I could think about was him. And finally this morning, the msn conversation;

"You alright?" - I'm sorry, is that just me? Or is that a stupid question?
"Yeah, you?",
"Yeah, I'm alright," - I hate the awkward pauses after that how are you's.
"Nikki, are we ok?"
"What do you mean?"
"Like do you hate me?" - yes.
"No"
"Just friends?" - no, i still love you...
"Definitely :)"

I hate not saying what i really mean... just to avoid an argument or disappointment. I hate that fact that him and I are just friends - I don't want to be just friends.

I hate and love him at the same time.

fml.

2010

thou shall be a good year.


PAH, that's what i said last year.


well, let's see how this year goes...