weekend.

Saturday; BP shopping, rich boy who was ''measuring me'' - wouldn't mine seeing him again ;)

Also, dinner with Hannah, Evie and Jess at Strada.Eminem, who stole Jess's Gnocchi and felt up her brother.
Alcohol at Hannah's, the eventful trip to Sains - hannah jumping for nik naks - bless her whens she tipsy, ahaa..

Sunday; nice riding :) and a nice evening texting someone who put a smile on my face :L even if it was for little while.


I love having good weekends :)

one word.

one word - is all it takes to ruin everything.

fuck.my.life.

i ruin everything.

why?

why can't i just accept that something is over?
why do i always have to try and fix something, even though i clearly know it shouldn't be fixed?
why do i always think about things that are in the past after i've alwasy said,'move on'

why do i always fall for the annoying dickheads who are incredibly sweet?

pain :(

stupid doctor.
stupid pain.


owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.

my brain has turned into mushh.

i've done ALOT of thinking this afternoon/evening. And now my brain actually hurts. I've thought about nearly everything from school to if i should dye my hair or not and a lot of stuff inbetween;about who i like/dislike and how do i know if i definatly like them/dislike them, why doing certain things benefits me/anyone in the future. Bad ideas and good ideas - mostly bad..

BRAIN ACHE

shoes.

i have new purple shoes.
they are amazing.
3/4 inches - can't remember exactly.
lots of straps
platform.


love them :)

it's 7am.

it's 7am, and normally i detest being up early - but i've been up for an hour, i've had 2 cups of tea, and i'm in a really good mood; waking up to cute texts puts a smile on my face :D

xo

It should be warmer.

Friday night; wondered with Evie. Met up with Hannah + Jess gots a chinese, and went back to Hannah's as it was cold and raining - stupid british weather - but we all had a right odl gossip xD

Saturday; Brighton with Hannah - so funny. Flirted with turkish men, who then followed us so we hid.. then we missed them :(
aha, hannah got a smile from a gimp :L
and i slapped an arse and got a number ;) from hannah's friend but still :L

weekend; so far so good (Y)

dreams.

okay, in english today, we were talking about dreams.. and i realised that i don't actually have a main dream/abition/ goal in life.

is that bad?

i mean, like yeah there are things i wanna do in the future but i wouldn't be bummed if it didn't happen..

:/

(8)

baaaaaack when, we used to talk about anything, when the nights were colder than usual and summertimes seems just not the same, what happened to our life back when?

the wigglers.

i hate them.

you think you've got rid of people that are negative/ not nice/ you want to move on from/ you just blantantly don't like them, then..

BAM!

they wiggle their stupid arses back in - fucking wigglers >.<

i want it gone.

1. snow. slush. sleet - whatever. It's bloody ridiculous!

2. my mood - bad mood all week :/

3. stress levals are all over the place

4. chocolate - it's making me fatter.

5. parents are doing my nut.

saw that coming..

well, i was unsure if i still liked someone. Until i found out this 'friend' is now obsessed with him after saying to me about how i should get back with him.. just me? or is that a bit wrong.




annoyed. again.


physics tomorrow.
fucked already.

oh go fuck off.

so annoyed.
so eurrgh >.<

i hate people who disagree with everything you say, or ''i've done/got that but better"

literally, go fuck yourself. I have no time for you!!


i really want some good news.. like proper good, OMG YESSS: good news, please :)


fucked chemistry up btw ;)

i'm okay thanks...

I GOT MA BOOTS xD sooo happy.

and i haves the giggles atm xD which is no help with you're trying to revise btw ;)

decided, to give Lara's party with my exes a miss xD

Had a nice time in town with Evieeee.


and yeahh, oh and btw, i solved my problem ;) and it wasn't scary at all, i'm just a loser.. :L still not telling rents though :L

OMGOMGOMG im hyper. and giggly...

:D

it can't be? oh shite..

well.. i assume you can pick a million things up from the title. And i'm still not gonna tell you what its about. I wasn't even going to make a blog.. but i'm bored and in a ''MY RENTS ARE GONNA KILL ME'' mood.

hmmm. I can only think of one soloution, and that scares me - like proper scares me. As i researched it, and I know it's safe now.. but still :

Happy note; going shopping tomorrow - getting the boots i've been praying for :) And the nik naks and chocolate i've been craving. Once home, i WILL revise for chemistry.

Sorted.

it actually works..

I went to a spa. An Re spa. On a friday afternoon. I paid attention, worked my brain. And you know what? I learnt a lot.

I know, i know it sounds silly. But in lessons, i never pay attention and never really take it in... but now, i'm going to. I'm gonna shut up in most lessons, (unless i HAVE to tell someone something:P) and focus, and you know what.. i AM going to pass my GCSEs.

I have never had to much positivity in myself... Well, i've kinda missed the 'new year, new start' and tbh that annoys me. I'm just gonna change my attitude about myself and what i can do. I'm going to try to be positive (it might not work) but this does NOT mean, i'm going to me nice :L

Anyway, busy weekend ahead; party with the exes on sunday :S Sometimes i hate lara :P - should be interesting... hehe kind of excited in a REALLY WEIRD MESSED UP WAY.

anywhoo, have a nice evening everyone :)
xxx

waiting for my uplift.

i just feel so.. blurrrrghh

i don't think there are any words to describe how i feel, but yeah, i'm not happy - although i'm giving the effect that i am, school mainly - i hate people asking, 'what's wrong?' IT'S CALLED NONE OF YOU BUISNESS. But yeah, i'm not totally sad, more annoyed? yes, at people.. not 1 person, multiple people and it's all BLURGHHH


could do with a good book and cuppa tea tbh, but it's all revision :/ (but i still gots me tea) - speaking of revision, i am waaaay stressing out over. I'm so behind in everything!!!!!!!


and btw, it happened again.. :/ sorry?

i feel like shit

title says it all really :/

i hate it.

I hate snow.

yeahh, when it first settles, it's like wow.. pretty...

but now. It'ss al this stupid solid snow/ice slush shit - not easy to walk in and AGHH

BRING BACK THE SUN MR WEATHERMAN!
please and thankyou :)

We love you Nettley

Yes, our headteacher has granted us two days off due to EXTREMELY heavy snow. Yes, snow. In horsham, and a lot of it :D

Well, i've done bugger all today :) Films, duvet and a nice pot of tea :)

Also, i've had many awkward and unpleasent/uncalled-for conversations and it's a bit :/ tbh

this is weird...

Right, so apart from the obvious, i don't like anyone atm. Which is weird...coz i normally like someone... maybe it's because there is no-one to like or i've liked everyone there is to like and i've run out of options.. :L

ahaa... i get bored so easily now, nothing to spend my time thinking about..


ANYWAY.


it's going to snow tomorrow. please be no school. PLEASE GOD!!

just friends?

Let's start with a little conversation I had with 'someone' and myself. I'll set the scene; a week ago, I was dumped without any reason whatsoever, so yes, I felt like crap, and didn't care about anything. New years eve, i got a phonecall from the 'dumper' explaining himself - I hung up- needless to say, I wasn't letting him ruin my new year. New years day, all I could think about was him. And finally this morning, the msn conversation;

"You alright?" - I'm sorry, is that just me? Or is that a stupid question?
"Yeah, you?",
"Yeah, I'm alright," - I hate the awkward pauses after that how are you's.
"Nikki, are we ok?"
"What do you mean?"
"Like do you hate me?" - yes.
"No"
"Just friends?" - no, i still love you...
"Definitely :)"

I hate not saying what i really mean... just to avoid an argument or disappointment. I hate that fact that him and I are just friends - I don't want to be just friends.

I hate and love him at the same time.

fml.

2010

thou shall be a good year.


PAH, that's what i said last year.


well, let's see how this year goes...